Prayatna Nepal is the self-help organization, which is working continuously to empower the living condition of women and girls with visual impairment. The organization is established by the group of both women with and without visual impairment. Among the seven board members, five (71%) are with visual impairment, including the chairperson. The idea of inclusion of women with and without disabilities in the organization is to make equal efforts from every individual with better understanding to improve the social, cultural, economic, environmental and political life of women with visual impairment.
Ms. Sarita Lamichhane, Chairperson of Prayatna Nepal welcomed all participants to the session, outlined the program's objectives, and created a suitable platform for participants to share their feelings and experiences. She then strictly emphasized the importance of maintaining privacy.
Following the introduction, an oath-taking ceremony was conducted to promote self-realization and accountability, with participants pledging not to share any information discussed outside the venue.
The first session focused on the topic, "Only if I had spoken on that day." Participants shared bitter experiences where they had been unable to speak up for themselves. They recounted heart-wrenching stories of facing severe mistreatment solely because of their visual impairment.
This structured approach allowed for a safe and supportive environment where participants could openly discuss their challenging experiences related to visual impairment and societal treatment.
One participant expressed regret for not taking legal action against her husband for polygamy. Her life was upended when, during her pregnancy, she discovered her husband was having an affair with a neighboring woman. He would transfer his salary directly to this woman's bank account, neglecting to provide for his pregnant wife. For the sake of her child and to avoid societal stigma, she tolerated mistreatment from the police, her husband, and the community. Her inability to see was used as a justification for this mistreatment. She struggled to make ends meet by selling incense sticks, caring for her baby, and even resorting to begging. Despite her perseverance through these hardships, she continued to face societal discrimination. People would criticize her, questioning why a visually impaired woman like her would choose to have a child in modern times.
One of the participants shared that she does not have to struggle for daily living as she belongs to a middle-class family. However, society and relatives miss no opportunity to put her father down because she and her brother are visually impaired. Her mother keeps her feelings to herself, but her father shares his emotions with her. Despite the difficulties and burdens she carries within herself, she stands as a pillar of strength for her father. She assures him that, being educated; she will be no less accomplished than those who can see the world through their eyes.
One of the participants shared a disturbing experience involving a trusted individual in her locality. This person, under the pretense of showing her things, inappropriately touched her breasts. When she confided in a friend about the incident, the friend unfortunately disclosed it to the perpetrator, who then began blackmailing her.
Another participant recounted an uncomfortable incident during her journey home from the hostel. While traveling on public transportation, a male passenger made inappropriate physical touch around her back.
Expanding on the topic of inappropriate touching in public transportation, one participant opened about an experience she had few years ago while traveling from Pyuthan to Kathmandu. Due to the crowded conditions, she was compelled to sit in the cabin area. There, the bus helper forced her to lie down, and when she refused, he placed her hand on his penis. This incident continues to cause her distress even now. She expressed that if she had not been visually impaired, he might not have dared to act in such a manner.
The participants also noted that some men, under the act of offering assistance with tasks such as opening bus windows, attempt to inappropriately touch visually impaired women, causing them discomfort.
Visually impaired women are sometimes deprived of basic rights not only due to negative societal attitudes but also, paradoxically, because of their parents' love and overprotectiveness. One participant shared such an experience. Her parents, out of excessive concern and lack of awareness about the care provided in hostels, initially refused to allow her to stay in one and pursue her studies. Fortunately, her brother was able to convince their parents, and they eventually permitted her to continue her education while residing in a hostel.
One of the participants shared her heart-touching life journey, transitioning from having low vision to becoming completely blind. She recounted how the unnecessary comments and interference from neighbors regarding her disability made her feel worthless. Particularly hurtful was a statement suggesting that someone who cannot see has no need to look nice, which deeply affected her emotionally. She also dealt with harassment, such as people pulling her bra straps and insensitively asking if it caused pain. Despite these distressing experiences, she noted that currently, her neighbors seem to have developed a more positive attitude towards her situation. Similarly, one of the participants, who initially had low vision but is now completely blind, is mistreated by her in-laws. They have even refused to register the marriage and provide her with only a small amount of money.
One participant's experience was particularly saddening, as her own parents failed to understand the pain their daughter suffered. Until the age of 14, she was deprived of education because her parents believed that her inability to see or speak properly would make schooling useless. Her situation was so terrible that, unable to express her need to use the toilet until she was 13, her parents left her in the jungle. The participant suffered unimaginable cruelty, including being struck on the head with an axe simply because of her visual impairment - an act of inhumanity. Her tortures were not confined to her home environment. After joining a hostel, she faced further abuse; whenever she stumbled or fell due to her disability, the caretaker would beat her, unjustly blaming her for the falls. Compounding these physical pains, her parents heartlessly took over the Nepal’s disability allowance provided by the Government of Nepal for her benefit, doing so for an extended period. Fortunately, she has now gained control over the allowance and is able to utilize them for her own needs.
Apart from these issues, an important phase in a woman's life—the blessing of being born as a girl child, i.e., menstruation—is also a major challenge for them. They are compelled to sleep on the floor, wash their heavy bed sheets, and even change their walking routes while menstruating. The number of days they must sleep on the floor depends on the caretaker's mood, sometimes four days and sometimes seven.
Regarding hygiene issues, some girls are prohibited from using buckets in the toilet and are forced to bathe at 4 AM regardless of the weather conditions.
One participant shared a sorrowful story about her life. When she was born, her relatives suggested to her parents that they should abandon or even murder her, advising them to claim that she had simply not woken up. Her parents, however, refused to do so. Later in life, when she got married, her father became furious. Even after she gave birth to a son, society continued to pass negative comments and torment her family, claiming that not only a visually impaired daughter but also a visually impaired son-in-law and grandchild had become burdens in their lives. However, as her son grows older, the same people who once criticized now express support, saying that the family has security for their future, as their son will take care of them.
Talking about the experience of their friends, one participant shared that her fellow resident in the hostel used to embrace herself, while the cooking staff couldn't tolerate her confidence simply because she was visually impaired. The staff would suppress and torment her in every possible way.
In the same context, another participant recounted that one of her friends left the hostel at 2 AM because she could no longer tolerate the staff's mistreatment, as she was criticized for eating more than others.
Reflecting on the day when they spoke up and initiated change, one participant shared her experience. Despite facing numerous obstacles, she courageously confronted her parents to convince them that the environment in her village was not favorable to her further studies. Through her determination, she successfully convinced for her desire to pursue her education in Kathmandu, ultimately making this aspiration a reality.
One participant demonstrated her bravery during an incident that occurred a few years ago while traveling to India for a medical checkup. When she experienced inappropriate touching, she responded by biting the culprit's hand.
Similarly, another participant recounted an incident where a male attempted to harass her under the pretense of helping her open a window. Reacting to this uncomfortable situation, she defended herself by striking him with her elbow.
Following the morning session, a lunch break was held. Upon reconvening, a brief entertainment session took place, during which participants showcased their talents in singing and caricature.
Subsequently, the participants were asked to discuss the challenges faced by visually impaired women. The discussion yielded the following outcomes regarding these challenges:
It was emphasized that not only the shelter home but also the broader environment is equally important for visually impaired girls to thrive and reach their full potential.
Following the discussion on challenges, participants were asked to provide suggestions on how Prayatna Nepal could contribute to the upliftment of visually impaired women. The following outcomes emerged from this discussion:
This approach allowed participants to move from identifying problems to proposing solutions, providing valuable input for Prayatna Nepal's future initiatives in support of visually impaired women.
The session concluded with Ms. Lamichhane expressing her gratitude to all participants for their time and valuable suggestions. To reinforce the commitment to confidentiality, a final oath-taking ceremony was conducted, ensuring the continued assurance of privacy regarding the discussions held during the session. This formal closure emphasized the importance of both the participants' contributions and the confidentiality of the shared experiences, providing a structured and respectful end to the program.